I’ve also been reading the Story of Stuff: How Our Obsession With Stuff is Trashing the Planet, Our Communities, and Our Health – and a Vision For Change by Annie Leonard. It is a real wake-up call. I try to be environmentally conscious – but by reading this book I’ve realized there is so much more we as a country can – and should – be doing. Leonard reveals, “We have a problem with Stuff. With just 5 percent of the world’s population, we’re consuming 30 percent of the world’s resources and creating 30 percent of the world’s waste. If everyone consumed at U.S. rates, we would need three to five planets!” My only hope is that this horrifying oil disaster will be the rude awakening our country needs.

(It’s not a spill, by the way. A spill is what my son does with his glass of orange juice. It’s a pain to clean up the spill, but we can do it in a few minutes. What is happening in the Gulf of Mexico is a man-made disaster. Definitely not a spill.)

Do the world a favor and forgo all the thousands of Toy Story 3 plastic junk, and all the other aggressively marketed single-purpose toys, and opt for good old fashioned imagination-inducing fabric scraps, empty containers of any type, art supplies, pebbles and the like. Its not easy to break the habit of consumption – believe me, the LEGO situation in my own house is admittedly out of control. We are working on it, though, and my husband has finally agreed that there is such a thing as “too many LEGOs”. Check out this fantastic article Children, Commercialism, and Environmental Sustainability by Tim Kasser, Tom Crompton, and Susan Linn.

Related posts:

Reduce, Reuse and Re-imagine!

Empowered by Play’s Toy of the Year Award: Nature!

When Did Sesame Street Become $esame $treet?

Way Too Many Toys

Announcing TRUCE’s Infant-Toddler Toys, Play &  Media Action Guide!

“You can go back outside and ride bikes. Or we can play backgammon. Or you can do LEGOs.” The boys didn’t immediately jump at any of those options. They weren’t quite done sulking yet. Eventually, one went back to the LEGO car he’s been working on, and his brother took me up on the offer to play backgammon. Halfway through the game the brothers joined forces against me in the backgammon game.  We laughed and strategized. We tried our best to plan ahead; to anticipate each other’s moves; to make good decisions; and roll with the luck of the dice. They beat me fair and square. And by then it was time for the night time routine of bath, books and bed.

I am happy that I stuck to my guns about our school night rule, even though it initially made the boys sad. It would be easy to slide into the habit of watching DVDs every evening, but I know that small moments, such as beating mom at backgammon, and reading together, are too precious to give up.  These small moments are disappearing from our busy lives. It is sad, because the cumulative effect of these small moments are connected relationships and emotional security. Instead, we often have electronic gadgets entertaining our babies (check out this AT&T commercial) and plugged in, multi-tasking, tweens, teens (see the recent Kaiser Family Foundation report) and stressed-out grown ups (see just about any of us).

So, here’s to singing off-key on long family car trips – instead of using headphones and video screens; to talking together and sharing laughs over dinner – and leaving the TV off during the meal; and to beating mom real good at backgammon – especially on a school night.

So what is the good news? The good news is this: parent involvement makes a difference. “Only about three in ten young people say they have rules about how much time they can spend watching TV (28%) or playing video games (30%), and 36% say the same about using the computer.  But when parents do set limits, children spend less time with media: those with any media rules consume nearly 3 hours less media per day (2:52) than those with no rules.“ (emphasis added)

It is heartening know, that even as the media explosion has exposed our children to more and more influences from outside the home, parents can still make a positive impact. That’s huge news, and I’ve been pondering the potential positive effects of mobilizing more parents to set media limits in their homes. If the KFF is finding that only three in ten young people have rules about TV, video games and computer use, imagine what would happen if we increased that number to six, seven or even eight out of ten. That would have an enormous effect on our children and our family life.

I have friends who are parents of teenagers, and they shut off their wireless internet at 10:oo p.m. every evening. Other parents take away phones at bedtime so their kids won’t text through the night.  Many families turn off the TV during meal times. Kids are apt to complain about these kinds of rules – that’s their job, isn’t it?  But in the end, telling your kids why you are making the rules, and having family meetings to review and revise rules as needed, will show your kids that you care about them.

What media rules do you have at your house? Share your ideas here and with other parents.  Let’s work together to increase the number of kids who have media rules at home! I am determined not to be depressed by the bad news brought to us by the KFF’s study.  Instead I am energized to activate parents!

Do kids imitate what they see on television? Well, clearly my kids do. Luckily, the wall was pretty much okay – and the head, too.

A more violent movie series, however, has had an even stronger effect on our boys. They recently began watching the Star Wars series. This is amazing to me, since up until a few months ago, they were too frightened to watch just about any movie. This includes Finding Nemo and even a few of the Thomas the Tank Engine episodes. (One episode features a train derailing from a bridge and falling into a river – leaving ghosts behind.)

When the boys started asking to watch the Star Wars movies (they had read some of their dad’s Star Wars books) we agreed. A part of me was glad that they were becoming less frightened by what they saw on the screen – and although I was never a fan of the series, their dad was. Plus they had watched plenty of NOVA space specials, and wanted to take the next leap.

However, now that they have been indoctrinated into the Star Wars universe, light sabers and guns have become a primary focus of their play. When we played charades with our cousins last week, my sons wrote down every Star Wars character they could think of (including from the Clone Wars animated series), and took special pleasure in acting out fight scenes they had watched in the movies. They’ve also gotten very adept at imitating the sounds of the automatic weapons and explosions. “I like the Clone Wars the best,” my son explained, “Because you don’t have to wait too long for something to get blown up.”

To be honest, I’ve only seen one of the movies, and I only watched it once. “I didn’t realize there is so much shooting in Star Wars,” I said. “Well, mom,” my son explained, “It has ‘war’ in the name. ‘Star Wars’. It’s all about war.” Wow. I never even thought of that. I always focused on the outer space aspect – never the war aspect. But there it is – right in the title.

Now, of course, I regret that we gave in and let the boys watch, even though they watch it with their dad. They aren’t even six years old yet. Last night, when my son was upset, he said he wanted to get a gun and shoot the whole world. That was hard to hear and I felt responsible. I told him, “You can be upset, and you can be angry, and you can tell us what you are angry about, but shooting people is a real serious thing. It isn’t a joke.” I realized they are just too young to be watching Star Wars. Even if they beg. My husband agrees. Watching the Star Wars series now, through the lens of a father who works in healthcare – and at a time when our country is actually at war – he has gained a new perspective.

I knew there was a reason we don’t have a television. I guess I just needed a reminder.

For me, the whole “tween” explosion is something I could do without. In fact, I am calling it the worst invention of the decade. Parents already feel their children are growing up too quickly, and children naturally have an urge to grow up. Puberty is hitting at earlier and earlier ages. But why do marketers have the right to exploit children – taking away their childhood and their families’ hard-earned money? The “tween” construct simply serves to indoctrinate children into a culture of consumption at an earlier and earlier age.

Stop the insanity and let our kids be kids. Check out Diane Levin’s book So Sexy So Soon (co-written with Jean Kilbourne) for more about age compression and helpful ideas about what parents can do to protect their children. There is also a powerful documentary, Consuming Kids, by the Media Education Foundation. Check out the Consuming Kids trailer and stay tuned here for news about an upcoming Empowered by Play screening of Consuming Kids.

Here’s to a healthy, happy and playful new year.

This weekend I spent time thinking about Milk Media and the Milk Rocks! campaign in schools. (See previous posts “The Brawl Begins” when Milk Media meets my son and Troublemakers and Peacemakers for background information.) According to the representative I talked with, the video games and movie previews available on the Milk Rocks! website are posted through automatic feed. That is why the violent content gets through (such as the shoot-em-up Commando game I found). The company is responsive to parents, they say, which is why the violent content I found has been taken down.