Empowered by Play » tweens

Thankful for blankets!

Geralyn — Wed, 23 Nov 2011 20:18:45 +0000

All hail the humble blanket! It is perhaps one of the best, all time classic playthings. Besides being a welcomed, cozy comfort for children of all ages, a blanket can be played with about a gazillion different ways. It is such the perfect toy that this year it has been inducted into the National Toy Hall of Fame^® at the Strong National Museum of Play in Rochester, NY. Yippee! I was thrilled to hear this news recently. It was a much-needed bit of sanity in the current not-so-sane world of children’s toys.

There are so many annoying toy lists out there – such as Yahoo’s Hot Holiday Toys for 2011 offering expensive and unnecessary gems like Sesame Street’s Let’s Rock Elmo ($60.00 for the Elmo doll, plus about 15 – 20 bucks each for his keyboard, drums and microphone! And I am guessing batteries are not included. ) Your toddler/preschooler will find many more things to do with a cozy blanket than with this single-purpose Elmo toy which they will soon grow bored of and will most assuredly grow out of. And then there is Common Sense Media’s 70+ Gift Ideas For Every Kid on Your List. This list is chock-full of electronic entertainment designed to keep our kids plugged-in. Apps, DVDs, websites to join – even the games they recommend are video games. There are no board games to help families play together without a screen involved. What happens when the power goes out ?! (And where I live, that’s been happening a lot lately.) Thankfully, Common Sense Media does recommend some actual books for children.

In the midst of all the schlock being marketed to families and kids this holiday season, three cheers and a big thank you to the Strong National Museum of Play for recognizing the blanket as a toy worthy of honor. As they so aptly describe:

“In imaginative play and make-believe, kids have discovered the many playful uses for the blanket. It fills in for a king’s robe, a bride’s veil, a superhero’s cape, a Roman soldier’s cloak, a princess’s flowing gown, and a wizard’s flying carpet. Thrown over a table, it forms a tent; draped around two chairs, it becomes a fort; on top of the carpet, it serves as a safe island surrounded by sea monsters. In puppet shows, the blanket substitutes for theater curtains; for a magician, the blanket conceals the secrets of the show. And in tug-of-war, the blanket gets top billing. It is also suitable for tossing toys in the air or for parachuting them back to earth.” (photo credit to the National Toy Hall of Fame website, also! )

As a child I used a blanket for just about all of those ideas listed above. I even remember using a blanket for impromptu winter picnics on the kitchen floor. What do you remember I wonder? Did you have imaginative adventures with your blanket? How do your children play with blankets today?

The blanket also joins the stick, inducted in 2008, and the cardboard box, inducted in 2005. Nice!

For more info on this season’s most terrible toys, check out Campaign for a Commerical-Free Childhood’s TOADY Awards.

“Each year, the Toy Industry Association gathers to present its TOTY (Toy Of The Year) Awards. In honor of the industry that has led the way in commercializing childhood, CCFC will present its TOADY (Toys Oppressive And Destructive to Young Children) Award for the worst toy of the year. From thousands of toys that promote violence and/or precocious sexuality to children and push branded entertainment at the expense of children’s play, CCFC has selected five exceptional finalists. “

Voting for the TOADY award is open until November 28th!

And if you are looking for toy buying advice, you may want to check out TRUCE’s Toys, Play & Young Children Action Guide or TRUCE’s Infant – Toddler Play, Toys and Media Action Guide.

For a related posts see:

A Real Toy Story

Good and Bad Toy Ideas

Doing More With Less This Holiday Season

Does Monster High make you nostalgic for Bratz?

Geralyn — Mon, 21 Mar 2011 12:37:31 +0000

The tarty Bratz dolls with a “passion for fashion” (pictured above) made many of us nostalgic for Barbie dolls. The Bratz dolls pushed the sexy envelope in a way that made good, old fashioned Barbie seem wholesome – perhaps even prudish. Now I am wondering, will the new Monster High dolls make us nostalgic for Bratz? Check out the Monster High Gift Set below and see what you think:

I heard mumblings about Monster High a few months ago, but I didn’t really key into them until I read a recent blog post by Peggy Orenstein. According to Orenstein, these creepy dolls, are Mattel’s biggest product launch since Hot Wheels. On the Mattel website, Monster High Dolls for 6 to 8-year-olds include 15-year-old Lagoona Blue who wears ultra-short shorts and fish net stockings. Lagoona Blue likes to “show up at parties in my scary cute little black dress” and also likes “checking out the bro’s with my girls”.

And let’s not forget Clawdeen Wolf. The extra-lovely thing about Clawdeen Wolf is that she is a 15-year-old “fierce fashionista” who has an intense beauty regime: “plucking and shaving is definitely a full time job, but that is a small price to pay for being scarily fabulous”. Yes, we definitely needed a doll for our 6-year-old daughters to teach them the value of plucking and shaving. Definitely. (For more about Clawdeen Wolf, check out this article from the Globe and Mail.)

There are Monster High webisodes, such as this one where there girls ditch Study Hall to get ready for Picture Day:

And on YouTube, the Monster High Fright Song has close to 5 million hits.

There is without a doubt, a growing interest in Monster High, which to me looks like a clever combination of the Glee, Bratz, High School Musical and Vampire crazes of late. If it were marketed only to teenagers, I still wouldn’t be happy, but at least I’d be a bit more understanding. However, the Mattel website clearly has these dolls geared towards 6 to 8-year-olds. Which inevitably leads to 4, 5 and 6-year-olds. Ugh. I can’t exactly say I’m nostalgic for Bratz Dolls, but e gads, how far will the toy makers push this?

Peggy Orenstein’s CINDERELLA ATE MY DAUGHTER

Geralyn — Fri, 25 Feb 2011 14:52:01 +0000

Peggy Orenstein’s book CINDERELLA ATE MY DAUGHTER wasn’t the book I hoped it would be – it was better.

I was hoping she’d knock the marketing giant flat on its exploitative keister and that her book would make a strong and irrefutable case against Disney’s shameless and relentless marketing to young girls – opening parents’ eyes to all harmful stereotypes that Disney foists on our young girls and boys. I was hoping for a lambasting.

Instead, Orenstein offers the reader a deeply nuanced, thoughtful and honest look into her personal journey of parenting her young daughter through the princess years. As a mother of only boys, I appreciated the chance to enter into the complicated world of raising a happy and confident daughter in our current “girlie-girl culture”. Orenstein looks at American Girl dolls, Bratz dolls, Hannah Montana, Britney Spears, Internet chat rooms, Greek myths and more, taking the time to see what is behind the headlines and what the research is telling us. She talks to other parents about the choices they are making for their daughters. Orenstein helps illustrate that as your child moves from preschooler to tween, teen and beyond, the choices you make and why you make them will help shape how your daughter sees the world – and sees herself in the world. The book is sort of a wake-up call to wake-up and be present in your daughter’s media life.

For a terrific interview with Orenstein, check out the podcast and transcript of her hour with Healthy Media Choices’ Mary Rothschild. Here is a powerful excerpt from the interview where Rothschild hits the nail on the head and helps crystalize the message that Orenstein is sending us:

Mary Rothschild: This is one of the keys, I think – intentionality. Being intentional, even if you decide to let all the Princess stuff in. Whatever you decide for your family, being intentional makes all the difference in the world. The child (senses it).

Peggy Orenstein: That’s actually a great way for me to put it, so I appreciate your telling me that. When I talk about it, I’m going to say that, if you don’t mind. I can’t tell you what decisions to make for your child but, whatever you do, to provide context. I wanted to start a conversation and I wanted to provide some context and information so that parents could make their choices more wisely, but I guess what that does mean is make them intentionally. If you’re going to let your daughter get the twenty-one-piece Disney Princess makeup kit, know what you’re doing. That’s fine. That’s your choice. That’s your right, but know what you’re doing.

Be intentional about your choices. Good advice for parents of boys, too. For the full podcast and interview please check out Healthy Media Choices.

Milk Media Madness

Geralyn — Thu, 08 Apr 2010 02:38:18 +0000

Is it too much to ask that our school children eat a school lunch without being marketed to? I don’t think so. A few months ago, I wrote about Milk Media and their Milk Rocks! campaign. At that time I was upset about the Bakugan website advertised to my 5 year-old son on his school milk carton. Since then, both Milk Media and my local dairy have assured me that this won’t happen again. There won’t be a media character or a website advertised on their milk panels. Or, more accurately, there won’t be any website except for “Milk Rocks!”. Their website continues to be advertised to school children across the country every day.

Check out these images of some of their featured performers:

Every time I check out the Milk Rocks! website, I get more and more upset. The website features sexy singers (see above) and video games (some of them, such as 3 Foot Ninja II, are violent). They have trailers for all kinds of movies, including violent PG-13 movies such as Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. Their contests and content are aimed at older children (13 -18) though their website appears on milk cartons for students of all ages - including kindergartners and elementary students. Now, when I look at the website, I see that kids are encouraged to “become a fan of Milk Rocks! on Facebook”. I am not naive. I know that there are 11 and 12 year-olds on Facebook, but should school milk cartons be encouraging that?

Why is this happening? How is Milk Media allowed to do this? Their website states proudly: “Milk Rocks! connects with students using milk carton side panels to lunchroom posters and book covers. Our Dairy partners make it all possible – their delivery personnel are in and out of every school every day — delivering cartons, checking posters, distributing book covers. We don’t just ship materials and hope for the best, we’re there every day.” Well, I have been trying to get in touch with my local dairy to ask more questions about this, but don’t have any answers yet. I truly do not believe that Milk Media should have such easy access to our children – especially when most parents do not even realize what is going on.

Milk Media and their Milk Rocks! campaign claim their aim is to increase low fat milk consumption (as opposed to sugary drinks), though healthy messages are only a tiny portion of all that the website has to offer. There is a bit of information about the health benefits of drinking low fat milk. There is also advertising from smallsteps.gov which encourages water drinking and exercise, however that ad popped up less often than the Facebook and Twitter ads when I browsed the website. Their motto, “Plug in. Drink up.” just doesn’t sit right with me either. Apparently, the motto refers to the electronic music and milk, but to me it sounds as if they are encouraging kids to play video games while drinking. Maybe that’s just me.

In my eyes, Milk Media continues to pull a fast one on parents (and schools) across the country. Enough already! If you think so, too, write to them at info@milkmedia.com or info@milkrocks.com. Find out if schools in your area are involved, and if so, contact your local dairy and let them know how you feel.

“The Brawl Begins” when Milk Media meets my son

Troublemakers and Peacemakers

Small moments

Geralyn — Thu, 18 Mar 2010 01:08:55 +0000

Last night after dinner, my sons begged and begged to watch a DVD. We don’t have television, and we have a “No DVD on school nights” rule. I stood firm and upheld the rule. Oh, my goodness, were there tears. “It’s okay,” I said. “You can be sad.” One son, looking outside and seeing the light still in the sky implored, “Look, it’s still so early. Why can’t we watch a DVD? We have more time now.” I tried to explain (once again) the phenomenon of daylight savings and turning the clocks ahead one hour. It’s hard for a six-year-old to grasp. His brother tried a different tactic. “You can give us yogurt treats or you can let us watch something. You have to chose one.” Actually, son: I don’t. I did, however, remind the boys of their other options.

“You can go back outside and ride bikes. Or we can play backgammon. Or you can do LEGOs.” The boys didn’t immediately jump at any of those options. They weren’t quite done sulking yet. Eventually, one went back to the LEGO car he’s been working on, and his brother took me up on the offer to play backgammon. Halfway through the game the brothers joined forces against me in the backgammon game. We laughed and strategized. We tried our best to plan ahead; to anticipate each other’s moves; to make good decisions; and roll with the luck of the dice. They beat me fair and square. And by then it was time for the night time routine of bath, books and bed.

I am happy that I stuck to my guns about our school night rule, even though it initially made the boys sad. It would be easy to slide into the habit of watching DVDs every evening, but I know that small moments, such as beating mom at backgammon, and reading together, are too precious to give up. These small moments are disappearing from our busy lives. It is sad, because the cumulative effect of these small moments are connected relationships and emotional security. Instead, we often have electronic gadgets entertaining our babies (check out this AT&T commercial) and plugged in, multi-tasking, tweens, teens (see the recent Kaiser Family Foundation report) and stressed-out grown ups (see just about any of us).

So, here’s to singing off-key on long family car trips – instead of using headphones and video screens; to talking together and sharing laughs over dinner – and leaving the TV off during the meal; and to beating mom real good at backgammon – especially on a school night.

The Power of Parenting

Geralyn — Wed, 27 Jan 2010 15:51:52 +0000

I’ve been thinking more about the new report from the Kaiser Family Foundation and the great deal of bad news it has about our kids. For example: “Today, 8-18 year-olds devote an average of 7 hours and 38 minutes (7:38) to using entertainment media across a typical day (more than 53 hours a week).” The report adds that children who use the most media state they are getting lower grades, get in trouble a lot and are sad or unhappy, when compared to peers who are less plugged in.

So what is the good news? The good news is this: parent involvement makes a difference. “Only about three in ten young people say they have rules about how much time they can spend watching TV (28%) or playing video games (30%), and 36% say the same about using the computer. But when parents do set limits, children spend less time with media: those with any media rules consume nearly 3 hours less media per day (2:52) than those with no rules.“ (emphasis added)

It is heartening know, that even as the media explosion has exposed our children to more and more influences from outside the home, parents can still make a positive impact. That’s huge news, and I’ve been pondering the potential positive effects of mobilizing more parents to set media limits in their homes. If the KFF is finding that only three in ten young people have rules about TV, video games and computer use, imagine what would happen if we increased that number to six, seven or even eight out of ten. That would have an enormous effect on our children and our family life.

I have friends who are parents of teenagers, and they shut off their wireless internet at 10:oo p.m. every evening. Other parents take away phones at bedtime so their kids won’t text through the night. Many families turn off the TV during meal times. Kids are apt to complain about these kinds of rules – that’s their job, isn’t it? But in the end, telling your kids why you are making the rules, and having family meetings to review and revise rules as needed, will show your kids that you care about them.

What media rules do you have at your house? Share your ideas here and with other parents. Let’s work together to increase the number of kids who have media rules at home! I am determined not to be depressed by the bad news brought to us by the KFF’s study. Instead I am energized to activate parents!

Plugging in your kids – a slippery slope

Geralyn — Thu, 21 Jan 2010 16:45:31 +0000

Yesterday’s NY Times featured a great article about kids and electronic media consumption – If Your Kids Are Awake They’re Probably Online. The researchers were amazed at the increase they found, thinking that we’d already reached a saturation point. Turns out kids are multi-media tasking at an astronomical rate, with smart phones, computers and more.

“Those ages 8 to 18 spend more than seven and a half hours a day with such devices, compared with less than six and a half hours five years ago, when the study was last conducted. And that does not count the hour and a half that youths spend texting, or the half-hour they talk on their cellphones.

And because so many of them are multitasking — say, surfing the Internet while listening to music — they pack on average nearly 11 hours of media content into that seven and a half hours.”

That is more time than they spend in school! In the comment section after the article, many teachers wrote in and reported rampant texting during class time. So even when kids are in school, they are often still plugged-in.

One mom’s story in particular hit home for me:

In Kensington, Md., Kim Calinan let her baby son, Trey, watch Baby Einstein videos, and soon moved him on to “Dora the Explorer.”

“By the time he was 4, he had all these math and science DVDs, and he was clicking through by himself, and he learned to read and do math early,” she said. “So if we’d had the conversation then, I would have said they were great educational tools.”

But now that Trey is 9 and wild about video games, Ms. Calinan feels differently.

Last year, she sensed that video games were displacing other interests and narrowing his social interactions. After realizing that Trey did not want to sign up for any after-school activities that might cut into his game time, Ms. Calinan limited his screen time to an hour and half a day on weekends only.

So last Wednesday, Trey came home and read a book — but said he was looking forward to the weekend, when he could play his favorite video game.

As parents, we sometimes do not see the full ramifications of our decisions until it is too late. (I recently wrote about my regrets in letting my sons watch Star Wars.) But the times when we can see the writing on the wall, and make decisions now that will help our children later, are powerful. Setting media limits when kids are young makes it easier to keep things somewhat under control down the road.

We don’t have television at our house, but we do watch DVDs. I am strict about not watching DVDs on a school night. One of my sons occasionally complains about this rule, but we stick with it. I know that as they get older, and have more homework and after-school activities, the ground rules about DVDs will have already been set. However, as Kim Calinan reports, parents can make changes mid-stream, especially if they have conversations with their children about their concerns.

I highly recommend the NY Times article – and the wide range of comments posted. It is a good snapshot of where were are today, and how as individuals with a variety of viewpoints, we view our current electronic media-filled world.

Empowered by Play’s nomination for worst invention of the decade: "Tween"

Geralyn — Mon, 28 Dec 2009 20:08:00 +0000

There is some debate about where and when the term “tween” first hit the mainstream. There is also debate about the exact tween parameters. Some say tweens are the 8 to 14 year olds; others say 9 to 13 year olds; and others claim 6 to 12 year olds. And now, we even see the term “pre-tween” for the 4 to 6 year old market. Scary! Without debate, most tween marketing is aimed at girls, and is often over-sexualized. Many folks attribute the tween explosion to the emergence of two marketing moguls: the Olsen Twins (Mary-Kate and Ashley who grew up on the television show Full House).

For me, the whole “tween” explosion is something I could do without. In fact, I am calling it the worst invention of the decade. Parents already feel their children are growing up too quickly, and children naturally have an urge to grow up. Puberty is hitting at earlier and earlier ages. But why do marketers have the right to exploit children – taking away their childhood and their families’ hard-earned money? The “tween” construct simply serves to indoctrinate children into a culture of consumption at an earlier and earlier age.

Stop the insanity and let our kids be kids. Check out Diane Levin’s book So Sexy So Soon (co-written with Jean Kilbourne) for more about age compression and helpful ideas about what parents can do to protect their children. There is also a powerful documentary, Consuming Kids, by the Media Education Foundation. Check out the Consuming Kids trailer and stay tuned here for news about an upcoming Empowered by Play screening of Consuming Kids.

Here’s to a healthy, happy and playful new year.